If beauty doesn't matter, does that just make you a loser?

Paris has the highest amount of Tourist traffic year round over any other destination.

Aside from the fact that it's somewhat annoying to live somewhere so heavy with tourism, it's given me a continuous refresher of the culture back home.

The culture in France is somewhat different than in the US. Aside from the more obvious, there's this whole bit about how the people(specifically the women) aren't absorbed in dieting fads. There are dozens of reasons why, but the most important to me is that these women KNOW how to take care of themselves, and so they do, and they're proud of their bodies.

This isn't even the point of my post, but I promise I'm getting there.

While in Paris, I haven't seen nearly as many negative ads towards women. There isn't this huge air of horrid self-image. I'm not saying that they don't judge themselves. But the fact is, MOST of the women care about their bodies. They don't sit in front of the tv at night(or ever, really) and binge eat Ben & Jerry's and packaged cookies. They don't snack mindlessly while they do homework/work/sit at the computer. They eat three meals a day. No more, no less. They take their time, and eat until they're just content, not stuffed. And their dessert, unless they're on holiday, usually consists of fruit.

A few weeks back, I was walking to the library, not really paying attention to my surroundings. You know once you know the pattern, and routine of somewhere you're going, and you stop paying attention to the trip, but only the destination? So, as I'm walking, I hear a group of people speaking English ahead of me. Now, remember how high the tourist rate is in Paris? Despite this, I always get somewhat excited when I hear people speaking English. My brain turned off auto-pilot for a minute as I took in this family. One of the girls in the family looked to be about 12-13. She was a bit on the chubby side, and wearing a shirt that said "BEAUTIFUL LOSER".

And I got kinda mad.

I don't think I would ever see a Parisian wearing something self-deprecating like that.

What is it about Americans that make us feel like it's okay to consistently put ourselves down? And have it be accepted by everyone?

Some people argue that if we're drawing the attention to it purposely, it's kind of like owning up to it. Like,if we make fun of it first, no one else can make fun of it, right?

I used to think like that. In fact, 2 years ago my best friend and I made t shirts(Glee style) that clearly stated our biggest physical insecurity. Later that week, we wearing them and another friend walked up to me and said, "Why on earth would you wear that?" I blinked a few times before telling him that I was owning up to my ugly legs. He looked at me like I was stupid, and then told me that he wouldn't have noticed any problems with my legs until he saw that shirt. Once he saw the shirt, he started wondering if there WAS something wrong with my legs(we were at a lake. So seeing my legs all day, every day, is an inevitability).

The thing is, if that girl wasn't wearing a shirt that screamed "LOSER" I wouldn't have thought she was a loser. No one would.

And, I know it said "Beautiful" first.

But that doesn't make it okay.

That's like saying "Only somewhat disgusting brownies". It's okay because they're still brownies, right?

Besides, if "looks don't really matter", than where does leave this girl? With a shirt that just says "LOSER"??

I've since worn that t shirt a few times. Every time I'd wear it, I'd make sure to pair it with something that covered my legs entirely. And the few times my calves were visible, I would feel so so anxious. I didn't feel like I was owning up to this insecurity. I just felt even more insecure. This past year, I put it on one day sitting in the apartment. And Bonnie turned to me and starting asking about the shirt. Finally, she told me to change out of it before the boys came over. "You don't need to feel negatively about that. No one notices anything wrong, until you throw it in their faces." Even if there was no truth to that shirt, people would see it and decide that, yes, I had ugly legs. Because then they were put under scrutiny, and they would see the flaws that I wanted to hide.

Doesn't that defeat the whole purpose?

I digress.

Our culture is one of being okay with the constant stream of negativity we throw towards each other, and it hits hardest on young girls. If you get under the skin of a girl when she's 12 or 13, and she hasn't grown into herself yet, than that bad self-image is going to stick with her, unshakeable, no matter how much her body changes.

And that's just not fair.

Grumpy kids and long train rides...Paris week 7

Last week was amazing, and incredibly beautiful. I couldn't imagine being somewhere more beautiful than Normandy. I'm absolutely convinced that this is the most beautiful country...

After we got home from Versailles, we spent a few days getting ready, doing laundry, and repacking. We were meant to leave Thursday, but changed it to Friday, which made our preparations much less stressful. 

Thursday evening I finally got around to going up Montparnasse tower, and I watched the sunset. It. Was. Breathtaking. Everyone gathered around the few areas that made for good pictures, and watched.

I was tempted to stay and wait for the sky to get dark and for the lights on the Eiffel Tower to turn on, but I wanted to walk home and I didn't want to wait 30 minutes for it to get dark.

I got one on the way home, anyway. 

And then Friday, the adventure started. 

We left at 8 in the morning to catch our train headed South. There had been an accident with a train the day before, but we had been assured that it wouldn't make a difference in our travels. Our train was delayed leaving about 20 minutes, but then we were off. 

Until right after we passed Bourdeaux...and the train stopped. And we waited 2 hours before they kicked us off the train. We took a taxi to Lourdes, which was our final destination, which took an extra 2 hours. 

By the time we got there, it had been 8 hours since we left that morning...and it was supposed to be a 4-5 hour trip. We were exhausted. 

Saturday, we headed into the mountains.

I could show you a hundred pictures of how beautiful these mountains were...

I mean, I love my Sandia mountains, but these were just gorgeous.

We had lunch at a cute place called "ze bistrot", and then we went and visited the Castle of Henry IV. It was really beautiful.

Sunday, we headed back up to the mountains to watch Nicolas, my host dad, in his bike race. 

Fun fact: they do this bike race here every year, during the Tour de France. It's the same trail that they ride in the Tour, but it's the day before the actual tour visits that city. It's actually pretty cool. And since my dad is such a fan of the Tour, it made it a bit cooler. 

We stopped to cheer after the first climb. The kids had these huge inflatable hands and they high-fived everyone that rode past. It was hilarious.

After lunch, we stopped at a Zoo, and they had some of the funniest things...like an insect habitat. I laughed pretty hard at that one.

How cool is it that they let them into the habitat?!

"Hotel Insectes"

It was raining pretty hard by the time the race finally ended later that day, and the kids were exhausted by the time we got home.

Monday there were a few delays in our train, but we finally made it home last night. The kids were exhausted and grumpy.

Tomorrow we head to London! It's crazy to think that I'm more than half way done with my time here...today marks 5 weeks before I go home. I'm really excited to get home(cuz I'm excited for school. How weird is that?!) but I am enjoying these last weeks so so much. The food is amazing, the people are amazing, and I am so so blessed. :)

"Maman, Regarde! Les vaches!" Paris week 6 & 6.5

Tuesday there was a power outage in our apartment complex. It started at about 9, right before I left my host family's apartment(they live downstairs and across the courtyard). It wasn't a huge problem tho. When I got to my apartment and realized that the power was out there as well, I decided to go on a run. I figured that I'd stop by the library on the way home as well, and the power would be back by then.

So, I climb down the 8 flights of stairs and push the button that opens the door, and I threw my weight against the door to open it. Aaaaand...nothing. See, the security doors of many of the apartments are controlled by electricity. You put the code in from the outside, it opens. You push the button from inside, it opens. After a few minutes of angrily pushing the button, I came to terms with the fact that I was locked into my apartment. And I wasn't thrilled. 

Luckily for me, there are 3 doors around the courtyard that all connect at the top of their staircases, with hallways branching to the various parts of the building. I saw through the window that one of the doors was propped open, so after walking back up the stairs, and then down another set of incredibly dark stairs, I was free. 

But when I got back 1.5 hours later, the lights were still out. And I was nervous to leave because I didn't want to get locked out. And it was pouring. The mini "blackout" lasted another 4 hours. It was strange, because it was just our building. 

Wednesday was meant to be full of tall towers and over priced t shirts, but it was pouring rain most of the day. So I only ventured out long enough to visit Trocadero, before I left for a long bus ride to pick S up from day camp.

The view from Trocadero.

After picking him up, we waited at the bus stop for 15 minutes before the bus arrived. And then we watched it drive past. As we flailed our arms about, hoping the bus would stop, the grouchy looking driver shook her finger at us, her expression as cold as our toes(it was still pouring rain). We walked around for another 15 minutes, stopping at every bus stop, looking for a bus that was headed home. Finally, I gave up and we got a taxi home. By this time, S was exhausted and grumpy, and I looked like a drowned rat. 

Poor baby passed out on the way home.

Turns out he got a fever, and I tried really hard not to feel like the worst nanny ever.

Then, Thursday, I headed to the top of the Eiffel Tower. I can't believe it took me 5 weeks to get myself up there...and obviously, I picked the worst time. The weather was just as great as the day before...meaning, the weather was horrible. But, it didn't rain for the two hours it took to get up and then back down the tower, so I'm grateful for that.

Obviously, we WOULD end up in a cloud...

Friday afternoon we headed to a Normandy.

And I am convinced that there is no place more beautiful.

Rock beaches and cold water means I kept my shoes on, thank you very much. 

We stayed until Sunday morning, when we took a quick stop in Les Havres so I could go to church, and for lunch. We drove straight through to Versailles, where we stayed until Tuesday evening. 

We stayed in the Trainon Palace, owned by Hilton(I feel proud right here, even tho I don't work there anymore...) our days were basically swimming, eating, and walking.

Isn't he cute??

 We also took a rowboat out onto the Grand Canal and it was beautiful. The kiddos pointed out every duck, swan, and ugly duckling(which were actually adorable..)

We're taking two days to recalibrate(and do laundry) before we head to Southern France this Friday. 

I am loving the traveling around more than just sitting in Paris. And it's not just because we're travelling, although that's a major plus. There's a lot more structure, and it makes my days in Paris more important, because I have to actually plan on the things that I want to get done while I'm here.

And now that we're spending a lot more time together, the kids and I are getting a lot closer. E told me this week that she was going to miss me when I left, so I take this as a win. ;)

Who knows when my next post will be, because I don't have wifi much when we're travelling. But, as always, thank you to everyone for their encouraging and loving words. <3 :)

Paris Weeks 4&5

I kept meaning to write this post last week, and I never got around to it. A lot of really big changes are coming up in the next few weeks, so my weekly posting may not be weekly.

BUT. Before I talk to you about the exciting stuff coming up(it's really exciting), here are some highlights:

Two weeks ago, some lovely girls from my ward invited me to go to Saint Chapelle with them. However, when we got there, it was closed(they were preparing for a concert). So, we went to the Opera house instead.

Besides the fact that it was BEAUTIFUL, this also just so happens to be the building where they filmed Phantom of the Opera. How cool is that? I definitely need to re-watch it now...

And yes, there really is a lake underneath it.

The staircase behind me is where they filmed the "Masquerade!" scene.

It was incredibly breathtaking, to say the least.

I hope you guys can endure food pictures...I found a cute gluten free bakery in the 4th Arrondissement, and had to restrain myself to only two pastries. They were so good.

Then, that weekend, we spent half a day in Versailles. We didn't get a chance to visit the Palace, but we did stop by in front and admire it. Holy goodness, it was beautiful. (Don't worry, I'll get another chance soon to go inside!)

What we DID do there, was go swimming(I guess there wasn't somewhere suitable in Paris??). We visited the Waldorf Astoria there in Versailles. I guess my host family has some sort of deal there, because they let us use the pool without being guests. The hotel was beautiful, but it sorta made me miss my little family back at the Hilton in Salt Lake.

E, getting into the pool.

After we finished swimming, we went and ate in the Gordon Ramsey restaurant that was on property. I was so hungry that I didn't take a picture of my beautiful lunch(salmon. All the entrees here are so healthy and delicious). BUT, I did take a picture of my dessert, so you could all be jealous of that. ;)

Took a selfie on my run outside the Eiffel Tower. 

This is M. I try not to pick favorites, but...;)

I'm starting to develop a really beautiful tan from my favorite walking shoes. 

This last week was the last week of school for the kiddos, which meant there were a lot of half-days, a lot of picnics, a lot of birthday parties, and a lot of friends coming over. Which meant my schedule was crazy insane, and I didn't really have time to go do anything. When I'm not with the family(and it's not raining), I go sit in the Champ de Mars and read. It's so great. The only thing you have to watch out for are the ladies trying to get you to "donate" money for their various causes. But as long as you know how to defer them, it's pretty peaceful, despite children running around. It reminds me of home. ;)

On Friday, the first "official" day out of school, the family and I went to Parc Asterix, which is an amusement park near Chantilly, which is about an hour North of Paris. The park is based around a French cartoon, Asterix, and it's all a play on the Romans and Greeks and the invasions and all that stuff. It was really cute, and every section of the park was themed differently(Rome, Greece, Egypt, etc.).

Entering the park.

 The first ride we went on started with you sticking your faces into these little boxes on the wall, where a camera would take your picture. You walked into the next room, and after a few minutes of robust French talking and cheering over the speakers, a bunch of cartoon soldiers were projected on the walls, marching around. With our faces on them.

E and I on the Carousel.

"Turn around so I can get a picture!"
"Aurora, I can't! I'm driving!"

E, S, and I, with the two main characters. (Sorry for the way blurry picture)

Saturday, we went to an exhibition at the Grand Palais, on Augustus and Julius Caesar. Although it was majorly in French, there were some bits written on the walls in English, so I gleaned most of my information from that. Nonetheless, it was really cool to get to see all the statues and artifacts, which were actually pulled from numerous museums around Europe.

I have no idea why they're noseless.

M and I walking along the Seine. 

On Sunday(yesterday), I walked through this ENORMOUS market that went for probably 5 blocks, on either side of the sidewalk. They had the most amazing fresh fruits and vegetables, cheeses, meats, clothing, shoes, fresh bread. Oh my goodness, it was heaven. I'm hoping that I'll be in town on another Sunday so I can bring my camera and photograph how absolutely amazing and quaint the whole thing was.

Every single day has been incredibly full of babysitting. And I expect this next week to be equally as crazy. However, it is my last full(ish) week in Paris, and so I have big plans to squeeze as many last things as possible into this week. Such as:
The Catacombs
The Top of the Eiffel Tower(it's surprising I haven't done this yet)
Saint Chapelle(Also surprising)
Hotel Invalides(REALLY surprising I haven't done this one)

Now, I just said this was my last week in Paris. But I'm also not coming home until the very end of August. Confused?

I mentioned(in a post before I even left for Paris) that once school got out for the kids, the family was going on Holiday, and I'd be tagging along as their live-in Nanny. The work load will basically doubled, but we're going to be travelling all over the place, so I don't really mind TOO much.

I'm(unfortunately) somewhat out of the loop on our exact itinerary for the summer. So I'll have to keep you guys updated as we go. I do, however, know how the first two weeks will go.

This Friday afternoon, we're leaving and heading to Versailles, where we'll stay for 3 days. Then, we head to another city(I cannot, for the life of me, remember the name) that's somewhere generally nearby, to visit my host mother's family. We'll be staying there for 2-3 days, and then on that third day, we'll head back to Paris. We'll only be in Paris for 1 day, however, before we repack and head to London for a week.

So, expect tons of pictures on all of that, and you will all definitely get updated throughout my journey.

I've really enjoyed my time here in Paris. It is definitely going to be very different, not having my separate space from the family, or having the freedom of visiting the markets whenever I please, but I'm still really excited to get going.

So, here's to hoping that I make it everywhere in the next 3 days. And if I don't, we'll always have a day or two between destinations back in Paris, so I'll try to hit all the extra sites then.

Thank you to everyone for their support and love while I've been here! I seriously appreciate it so much!